Divorce FAQs

A divorce mediation is a voluntary and cooperative process by which a neutral professional facilitates a practical, informed decision between two spouses to resolve their differences. A trained mediator helps the spouses work through a series of defined steps designed to reach a fair and reasonable agreement on all issues related to their breakup (including divisions of assets and debts, parenting responsibilities, and support obligations).

Based on years of experience with divorcing couples, a mediator provides an impartial set of processes to address, clarify, and ultimately resolve all issues relating to the breakup of the spouses. The mediator creates active discussions to identify issues and craft solutions that both parties find agreeable. By defining the issues to be settled, gathering and analyzing the pertinent information, and creating effective communication, the mediator facilitates a mutually agreed upon settlement which will be used as the basis for moving forward with an equitable divorce.

When two parties go to court to adjudicate their divorce, both sides require attorneys that can cost anywhere from $250-$600 per hour. That’s not just for the court date, but collecting documentation, analysis, discussions with their clients and paralegal assistance all of which (remember, for BOTH sides) adds up to a very hefty legal bill. When both parties use a mediator to craft an equitable settlement, the costs are significantly reduced. If both parties were to go to court, they have little to no control over the outcome. During mediation, both parties participate in a safe, open discussion with mediators who have a more in-depth understanding of the parties and their particular situation, and who can be sensitive to the unique issues involved. In mediation, the final resolution is controlled fully by the two parties involved, not imposed by a court. Finally, when the two parties participate in a cooperative and respectful discussion with the goal of coming to an agreement, there is significantly less stress both on the parties and the family as a whole.

Mediators are trained to deal with all personality types. One of the benefits of mediation is that the process facilitates an environment where both parties' voices are heard. The mediator works to ensure both sides participate in crafting a resolution that work for each of them, not just the dominant partner. If you have experienced domestic violence or feel unsafe with your spouse, however, mediation is probably not appropriate. For mediation to work, both sides must be able to speak freely and openly about their needs and if there is any duress in the process it makes it difficult to craft a fair and equitable resolution.

Although your mediator may be a successful divorce attorney, no mediator can give legal advice to one side or the other. The entire point of mediation is that the mediator is fully impartial and is not allowed to give legal advice. We suggest that both spouses should get independent legal advice during the divorce mediation. Any settlement agreement created should be reviewed by your attorney to be sure that your needs are covered.

One of the main benefits of a mediated divorce is that the mediator gathers information, and through the cooperative mediation experience identifies the issues both parties agree upon and clearly defines the issues that are still in dispute. Once your case comes to court, the only parts that need to be reviewed by the court are those in dispute, saving significant time (and attorney’s fees).

A mediated agreement is signed by both parties and serves as the reference document for the court. The Judge will review the signed agreement and, if they find it just, signs a court order, finalizing the divorce.